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What drives your people?
Rick Warren
Every member of your congregation is driven by something, and you need to
discover what those forces are in order to better disciple those under
your care. Ultimately, you want to lead each member to be driven by God's
agenda - to live a purpose-driven life.
Most dictionaries define the verb drive as "to guide, to control, or to
direct." In your congregation, there are some driven by a problem, a
pressure, or
a deadline, and others driven by a painful memory, a haunting fear, or an
unconscious belief.
There are hundreds of circumstances, values, and emotions that drive
people's lives, and understanding what's driving them is a key to reaching
them.
Here are five common "drives" -
Some people are driven by guilt - They spend their entire lives running
from
regrets or hiding their shame. Guilt-driven people are manipulated by
memories. They allow their past to control their future, believing their
past
mistakes to be bigger than God. They often unconsciously punish themselves
by sabotaging their own success. When Cain sinned, his guilt disconnected
him from God's presence, and God said, "You will be a restless wanderer on
the earth." (Gen. 4:12, NIV) That describes most people today - wandering
through life without a purpose.
Some people are driven by resentment - They hold on to their hurts and
never get over them. Instead of releasing their pain through forgiveness,
they rehearse it over and over in their minds. Some resentment-driven
people "clam up" and internalize their anger while others "blow up" and
explode. Both responses are unhealthy and unhelpful. Resentment always
hurts you more than it does the person you resent. While your offender has
probably forgotten the offense and gone on with life, you continue to stew
in your pain, perpetuating the past.
Some people are driven by fear - These fears may be the result of a
traumatic experience, unrealistic expectations, growing up in a
high-control home, or even genetic predisposition. Regardless of the
cause, fear-driven people often miss great opportunities because they're
afraid to venture out. Instead they play it safe, avoiding risks and
trying to maintain the status quo.
Some people are driven by materialism - Their desire to acquire becomes
the whole goal of their lives. This drive to always want more is based on
the misconceptions that having more will make me "more happy," more
important, and more secure - but all three ideas are untrue. Possessions
only provide temporary happiness. Because things do not change we
eventually become bored with them and then want a newer, bigger, better
version.
Some people are driven by the need for approval - They allow the
expectations of parents or spouses or children or teachers or friends to
control their lives. Many adults are still trying to earn the approval of unpleasable parents. Others are driven by peer pressure, always worried by
what others might think. Unfortunately, those who follow the crowd usually
get lost in it. I don’t know all the keys to success, but one key to
failure is to try to please everyone. Being controlled by the opinions of
others is a guaranteed way to miss God's purposes for your life. Jesus
said, "No one can serve two masters." (Matt. 6:24, NLT)
There are other forces that can drive people's lives but all lead to the
same dead end: unused potential, unnecessary stress, and an unfulfilled
life.
Understanding these forces will help you look beyond the actions that
frustrate you to see the real need in these people's lives. Many of the
problems they face - and you will face as a church leader - are caused by
people driven by the wrong things. We need to lovingly look past the
problems, and call each church member to reach the fullness for which God
has shaped them.
As a pastor, one of the greatest gifts you can offer is showing people how
to live lives guided, controlled, and directed by God. Nothing matters more
than knowing God's purposes for your life, and nothing can compensate for
not knowing them - not success, wealth, fame, or pleasure.
Without a
purpose, life is motion without meaning, activity without direction, and
events without reason. In the Bible, many different people expressed
this hopelessness.
Isaiah complained, “I have labored to no purpose; I have spent my strength
in vain and for nothing." (Isa. 49:4, NIV)
Job said, “My life drags by - day after hopeless day" (Job 7:6, LB) and “I
give up; I am tired of living. Leave me alone. My life makes no sense."
(Job
7:16, TEV)
The greatest tragedy is not death, but life without purpose.
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